JUST THE TRUTH, THE WHOLE TRUTH AND NOTHIN BUT THE TRUTH!! Truisms * If you’re too open minded, your brains will fall out. * Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. * Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you a mechanic. * Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. * If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before. * My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. * Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious. * It is easier to get forgiveness than permission. * For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. * If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. * Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. * A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. * Eat well, stay fit, die anyway. * Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it. * No husband has ever been shot while doing the dishes. * A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. * Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places. * Opportunities always look bigger going than coming. * Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it. * There is always one more imbecile than you counted on. * Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again. * By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends. * Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator. * Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world. * Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused. Kahn2015-10-24T13:22:07-05:00 Share This Post, Choose Your Platform! FacebookXRedditLinkedInTumblrPinterest